you can only try so hard before you give up move on and try harder. bite that bullet. your head becomes so clear when you know exactly what you want and it's hard to let people waste your time like you used to do. But sometimes you need timewasters to show you how badly you need what you want. sometimes they show you a better thing and your ambitions grow. Both have happened to me.


Just Saying

I always notice car doors closing by themselves when a driver gets out in a hurry. And I always cringe at the thought of the door closing quicker and crushing the passenger's fingers as they reach out quickly to tell him something. Or I always imagine a driver standing inside their car door taking directions about where to go and then suddenly getting smashed by an oncoming car. When I'm driving down the highway I imagine soaring through my windshield and laying on the cement. For some reason in these dreams the cars don't hurt me, they just massage my tired limbs. Everytime I imagine closing my eyes and just letting my car hit all the other cars I always hold my hands up like I'm on a roller coaster. I had speeding dreams last night. Where I was speeding my car through alleys and side streets. I wasn't in a hurry I just couldn't slow down. They, THEY say that means my life is moving too fast. I can see that. I have too much on my plate right now. Busy busy busy as the bokonists say. We are a generation never held responsible taking responsibility. I keep having this image of me waking up and stepping out of my body and jokingly shooting my laying self with my fingers.


Ch Ch CH CH Check it OUt

Stephanie and I plan on doing an iron chef challenge every week. Because we're lesbians and we love each other.



stephanie and I have a new blog going live tomorrow!!!

today was amazing!

I yam in love.




watching curtains move, probably one of my favorite pastimes.